anta was lying in bed with his new Thai girlfriend in a hotel in the Thai resort of Phuket.
After having great sex, she spent the next hour just rubbing Banta's testicles - something she loved to do.
As Banta was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, "Why do you love doing that so much?"
"Because", she replied, "I really miss mine."
=================================================================
Santa went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perked up and said, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!'
'What a coincidence' Santa said. 'This is a special day for me. I am celebrating.'
'This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating,' said the woman.'
'What a coincidence!' said Santa.
As they clinked glasses he added, 'What are you celebrating?'
'My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'
'What a coincidence!' said Santa. 'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'
'That's great!' said the woman, 'How did your chickens become fertile?'
'I used a different cock,' he replied.
The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said, 'What a coincidence!'
======================================================================
A Doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant, "Banta, I am going hunting tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients".
"Yes, sir!!!" answers Banta.
The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks, "So, Banta, How was your day?" Banta told him that he took care of three patients.
"The first one had a Headache so I gave him Analgin."
"Bravo Mate, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had running nose and I gave him Coldarin, sir" says Banta.
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table and shouts:
HELP ME! For 5 years I have not seen any man!!!!!"
And what did you do Banta?" asks the doctor.
"I put drops in her eyes!!!
=================================================================
Santa and Banta walk into a bar scamming for two-legged females.
Santa says, "Hey, check out the girl over there. I'll bet she's really hot in bed!"
He proceeds to go over and make small talk with her. Before long, they both leave for a one-nighter.
The next day, they meet up and are again scamming for anything that breathes.
This time Banta goes over to the same girl, pinches her in the rear, and the two were off for a quickie.
Fifteen minutes later, Banta comes back and compares notes with Santa.
Santa says, "I think my wife is better."
Banta nods his head and says, "Yeah, your wife is much better!"
=======================================================================
Jeeto and Preeto were having one of those girl to girl talks......
Preeto, "You're lucky that you don't have to put up with men having sex with you. I have to put up with Banta... and there's no telling where he last had his pecker."
Jeeto responded, "Just because I am esthetically challenged, doesn't mean I don't have to fight off unwelcome sexual advances."
Preeto asks, "Well how do you deal with the problem?"
Jeeto says, "Whenever I feel that a guy's getting ready to make a pass me, I muster all my might and squeeze out the loudest, nastiest fart I can."
Well, that night, Banta was already in bed with the lights out when Preeto headed to bed. She could hear him start to stir, and knew that he would be wanting some action. She had been saving her farts all day, and was ready for him.....so, she tensed up her butt cheeks and forced out the most disgusting sounding fart you could imagine.
Banta rolls over and asks, "That's you Jeeto ?"
=========================================================================
Santa was at home with his wife, Jeeto, when he heard a knock at the front door. He opened it to see his friend Banta there clutching his hands between his legs.
"What's wrong?", Santa said.
"I've been hit by a bloody cricket ball!" said Banta.
Just then Santa's wife wife, Jeeto, came to the door and said, "Quick, come in here and I'll look after you".
When Santa looked in the kitchen he saw Banta sitting on a dining chair, Jeeto had a bowl of rose water and petals and was bathing Banta's penis with cotton wool and water.
"How do you feel?" he said.
Banta turned and said, "Santa, I think what your wife has done has helped a lot!", then holding his finger in the air he said, "But I still think I will lose the nail!"
Three friends were sitting in a bar, drinking Beer, and discussing how stupid their wives were.
The first guy, "I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the market and bought meat worth 1000 bucks because it was on sale, and we don't even have a fridge to keep it in."
The second agrees that she sounds pretty thick, but says his wife is thicker.
"Just last week, she went out and spent 4 lacs on a new car," he laments, "and she doesn't even know how to drive!"
Banta nods sagely, and agrees that these two women sound like they both walked through the stupid forest and got hit by every branch. However, he still thinks his wife is dumber.
"Ah, it kills me every time I think of it," he chuckles. "My wife just left to go on a holiday in Germany. I watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there. And she doesn't even have a penis!
After having great sex, she spent the next hour just rubbing Banta's testicles - something she loved to do.
As Banta was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, "Why do you love doing that so much?"
"Because", she replied, "I really miss mine."
=================================================================
Santa went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perked up and said, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!'
'What a coincidence' Santa said. 'This is a special day for me. I am celebrating.'
'This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating,' said the woman.'
'What a coincidence!' said Santa.
As they clinked glasses he added, 'What are you celebrating?'
'My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'
'What a coincidence!' said Santa. 'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'
'That's great!' said the woman, 'How did your chickens become fertile?'
'I used a different cock,' he replied.
The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said, 'What a coincidence!'
======================================================================
A Doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant, "Banta, I am going hunting tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients".
"Yes, sir!!!" answers Banta.
The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks, "So, Banta, How was your day?" Banta told him that he took care of three patients.
"The first one had a Headache so I gave him Analgin."
"Bravo Mate, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had running nose and I gave him Coldarin, sir" says Banta.
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table and shouts:
HELP ME! For 5 years I have not seen any man!!!!!"
And what did you do Banta?" asks the doctor.
"I put drops in her eyes!!!
=================================================================
One Nighter
Santa and Banta walk into a bar scamming for two-legged females.Santa says, "Hey, check out the girl over there. I'll bet she's really hot in bed!"
He proceeds to go over and make small talk with her. Before long, they both leave for a one-nighter.
The next day, they meet up and are again scamming for anything that breathes.
This time Banta goes over to the same girl, pinches her in the rear, and the two were off for a quickie.
Fifteen minutes later, Banta comes back and compares notes with Santa.
Santa says, "I think my wife is better."
Banta nods his head and says, "Yeah, your wife is much better!"
=======================================================================
Sexual Advances
Jeeto and Preeto were having one of those girl to girl talks......Preeto, "You're lucky that you don't have to put up with men having sex with you. I have to put up with Banta... and there's no telling where he last had his pecker."
Jeeto responded, "Just because I am esthetically challenged, doesn't mean I don't have to fight off unwelcome sexual advances."
Preeto asks, "Well how do you deal with the problem?"
Jeeto says, "Whenever I feel that a guy's getting ready to make a pass me, I muster all my might and squeeze out the loudest, nastiest fart I can."
Well, that night, Banta was already in bed with the lights out when Preeto headed to bed. She could hear him start to stir, and knew that he would be wanting some action. She had been saving her farts all day, and was ready for him.....so, she tensed up her butt cheeks and forced out the most disgusting sounding fart you could imagine.
Banta rolls over and asks, "That's you Jeeto ?"
=========================================================================
Ball Injury
Santa was at home with his wife, Jeeto, when he heard a knock at the front door. He opened it to see his friend Banta there clutching his hands between his legs."What's wrong?", Santa said.
"I've been hit by a bloody cricket ball!" said Banta.
Just then Santa's wife wife, Jeeto, came to the door and said, "Quick, come in here and I'll look after you".
When Santa looked in the kitchen he saw Banta sitting on a dining chair, Jeeto had a bowl of rose water and petals and was bathing Banta's penis with cotton wool and water.
"How do you feel?" he said.
Banta turned and said, "Santa, I think what your wife has done has helped a lot!", then holding his finger in the air he said, "But I still think I will lose the nail!"
=====================================================================
Stupid Wives
Three friends were sitting in a bar, drinking Beer, and discussing how stupid their wives were.The first guy, "I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the market and bought meat worth 1000 bucks because it was on sale, and we don't even have a fridge to keep it in."
The second agrees that she sounds pretty thick, but says his wife is thicker.
"Just last week, she went out and spent 4 lacs on a new car," he laments, "and she doesn't even know how to drive!"
Banta nods sagely, and agrees that these two women sound like they both walked through the stupid forest and got hit by every branch. However, he still thinks his wife is dumber.
"Ah, it kills me every time I think of it," he chuckles. "My wife just left to go on a holiday in Germany. I watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there. And she doesn't even have a penis!
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